If a man of over sixty years old, preening himself on his wisdom, can make rape into a joke I should shut up; I should give up.
Alas neither did I ask my son, my father, my bestest (male) friend of over 40 years (all three of supreme intellect and feeling) how to go about exorcising the bad taste Ramana has left in my mouth (don’t get off on this one). Let’s rephrase: The turmoil he has caused me since his post. A large part of my lifelyhood is obtained by my being able to digest and interpret that which I read. The last 24 hrs or so since R’s brilliant joke have been a complete waste of my life. I cannot concentrate on printed matter far more important than the deficit displayed by one person somewhere in India. But then, as my father says about me: I care too much; not by quoting not so clever people called Frankl but actually “CARE”. Son, friend, not least father of my son, despair that I even take opinions of “the great unwashed” (British man’s words not mine) into account in my thinking. I take into account that which - in my heart and brain – makes its nest. There is now someone called Ramana who I will despise to the end of my days.
Ramana makes the pedestrian’s common mistake of mistaking “a bit of rough” for sex. RAPE, Ramana, is violation, VIOLENCE. Sex WITHOUT consent. The stronger muscle, the knife, the hands round your neck. Fun isn’t it? Oh yes. So happy to come away ‘unharmed’ still alive. And then there is hot water and soap. Plenty, unless you live in a country without hot running water. How do you wash it off then? Scrub it down with sand till you bleed even more? Never to be touched again by your “husband”. A shame to your family?
Do you actually have any idea whatsoever what VIOLENCE is? When all choice is taken away from you? When you are at the mercy of someone depraved? Someone who doesn’t understand humanity? Who can’t remember his own mother? A beloved sister, a friend, a cousin? I grant you: A penis – on the whole – does less damage than a gun or a knife.
And that’s just the women. Let’s forget women. They ask for what’s coming their way. How about young men? How about the brother of two friends of mine who (age 12) crawled home on his baby knees, happy to be still alive, bleeding out of his ripped arse, pissed on, semen dripping out of his mouth because a threesome couldn’t keep their dicks zipped up. Funny? Sure. If only his mother had had the presence of mind to tell him beforehand that rape – should it come his way – is something to be enjoyed.
Then, just to stick with the boys, there are prisons. An eighteen year old – qualifying in the eyes of the law as an adult – sent into the hell hole of sex starved (straight, not gay) men. Oh, yes. Where there is a hole there is a way. FUNNY? Titillating? Sure. Absolutely FUCKING hilarious.
Rarely in my life, if ever, Ramana, is someone beyond the pale. You are. Strange, don’t you think? One little remark, no doubt meant ‘innocently’ in your confined world, having such repercussions.
I note, with interest, responses to your post. gaelikaa being the only one who voices disapproval. I am very fond of Magpie – luckily he doesn’t appear to comment on your blog so, with a bit of luck, I will be spared the disappointment of another lukewarm response (Nick is good at those – but then he is a pretty lukewarm person anyway; don’t dismiss this comment, Nick. Think about it. A bit of passions goes a long way; you have potential). The one person’s comment I miss, and I mean miss, is GM’s. Typical that her machinery goes down when it counts. There is a conflict of interest for her: She is a no-nonsense person. Therefore she will not appreciate Ramana’s joke. On the other hand she likes Ramana – a lot; she also likes to hold the peace. Now what? Grannymar, I am so glad I am not in your position.
Jean, you like to be the peace maker. You aren’t. You stir. Did you really have to ask what, if I call Ramana’s doctor a “jerk” , makes that him [Ramana]? A jerk, I guess; even your powers of deduction must reach that far.
Ever the optimist, and I will, before I press send, check R’s comment section once more, Conrad will have the grace to not say a word on the subject. Such trust, don’t you think? I like the guy. He has grown on me big time.
Don’t know what I am going to do with this blog addressed – with feeling – to a handful of people.
So very very very disappointed,