Bitch on the Blog

June 1, 2010


Filed under: Human condition — bitchontheblog @ 04:15
Tags: , ,

Just as ALL made-to-measure tailors are to be found in Saville Row and, once upon a time, most of the English Press in Fleet Street and all bankers in the City so this house is plunged into ever increasing darkness. Why do all bulbs die at roughly the same time? And no amount of positive thinking will turn back on the lights. What I do need to do before night falls again is to go out and buy some replacements. Yes, really. I knew this days ago. However, no sooner does dawn rise I completely forget that darkness will descend once more.

Yesterday the apple of my eye and his mother had brief exchange on ‘obsolescence’. We came to snappy conclusion that if things were manufactured to last the whole economy would collapse.

The first time I heard about  the ‘obsolescence factor’ was when I learnt that tights and stockings were constructed so they’d eventually LADDER. Only snapping a heel, and limping with the other still intact, is worse than sporting laddered tights. I always, discretely, point out to someone when they haven’t done up their flies/zipper but to tell a woman you have never met before that she is laddered you have to assess her temperament first, likelihood of her carrying a spare pair and whether you really want to make a friend for life.

I remember occasion (at age 17) of snapping the heel of one of my winter boots on my way to school. The choice was simple: Am I going to be late for my lesson or am I going to make a complete ass of myself  in front of everybody (it was too cold to take off the other boot and just go barefoot). So I limped into the next shoe repair, got it fixed on the spot and arrived in the middle of my first lesson. The teacher noted in the registry: “Ursula deserves full marks for getting ever more inventive with foul excuses for being late”.

Thus characters are formed.




  1. It is so galling not to be believed when telling the truth. 10/10 for going into the heel bar/repairer. I’d have gone home.

    I once made the mistake of telling someone that her petticoat was showing. The reaction was very interesting (I think that is the best way to put it) Apparently it was meant to be!

    Psst! It’s bespoke tailoring in Saville Row… they can get veeery sniffy if you call it made to measure….

    Oh! Light bulbs…I solved that problem by replacing them at different times. About 3 months apart.

    Comment by magpie11 — June 1, 2010 @ 10:07 | Reply

  2. I gave up on stockings long ago. Tights don’t ladder-that’s a wide run, if they are heavy enough.

    Comment by bikehikebabe — June 1, 2010 @ 16:17 | Reply

  3. Tights? Gave up wearing ’em years ago….

    Comment by gaelikaa — June 2, 2010 @ 10:31 | Reply

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