Bitch on the Blog

March 21, 2011

In transit

Filed under: Communication — bitchontheblog @ 19:47

Dearest Consortium and grimly grinning hangers on, remind yourselves: Some of YOU laugh on account of your humoUr RIP. LOL. Unfortunately your laughter not discernible at the right intervals. And I talk – regardless.

Applause dismal – as is my failure to know when curtain should fall.

Neither does Con’s Size XL fit my dainty shoe size six (English). There is one person in this circle I should listen to when advising me whether to further air my inherent vileness. No, not BHB. She does not cast people against type.

Deep breaths (yours). Should you never hear from me again it’s not lack of my inflated wish to vent enlarged spleen but because of not remembering how to break into new, and splendidly named, blog. Where are Con and his ladder in hour of diminishing returns? First he created “Bitch on the Blog” now he is nowhere to be seen …

Good luck.

Kiss Kiss




  1. I am here. I am simply awaiting your response to Jean’s excellent questions.

    Comment by Conrad — March 21, 2011 @ 19:59 | Reply

    • Con, brill (and I hate abbreviations, say, veg instead of vegetables): You are here. This beats all my efforts in as yet failed attempt to surrect my new blog. You will love its name.

      Now you are here what am I going to do with nearly 5000 words typed over the last few hours, naturally all broken into sound bite sections of about 470 a shot, to be administered in short bursts over at my new blog? Keep it under 500, that’s my advice (don’t tell gaelikaa): I don’t know about dung beetles, but gnats have a short attention span. As I appeart to have. Jean’s questions? Need to find them. Will.

      Don’t stand by short notice. It’s that time of the day when I need to attend to son’s omnivour needs. Can’t believe how hard the guy is working in what amounts to his gap year. Will send evidence – not of work, but – in wake of your metalic suspension of disbelief – of his hair which, being so long, he needs to tie away for most hours of day. Such a pity.

      Conrad, I am so behind it’s awful. I don’t want sympathy. I just want to air what’s in my head. Which is over crowded. Forget Ramana’s obsessions: Who folds papers or pays bills before due? Try mine: The Blues. Incessantly, particularly Chuck Berry’s “Down the road one piece”, unless I listen to Mozart’s Requiem which, naturally, makes me cry.

      Yes, so in between cooking and doing everything else that has not yet received today’s attention I will find Jean’s questions. She is good at those. Like wasps the moment you serve lunch and fill glasses of wine in the languid outdoors first time temperature right. Make that minus people like my mother. She flaps. Flings her arms. Tell a person terrified of wasps to calm it lest she might be stung. Don’t. Stand by with calamine lotion instead.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — March 21, 2011 @ 20:39 | Reply

  2. I’m trying to think of your new name. I’m not very clever at that.

    Several people love you. Some like you. The rest think you are very interesting. Magpie (forgive me for semi-quoting you) said that there was this person named Ursula that was putting intelligent comments on his blog.

    Wrap Your Mind Around This
    Take It or Leave It
    Free For All

    I told you I wasn’t very clever, but I’ll be thinking.

    Comment by bikehikebabe — March 21, 2011 @ 21:16 | Reply

  3. If you need help creating your new blog I’d be willing to try. Can’t guarantee anything, but I do have a bit of experience. Part of my motto is, “Find what you love to do and find a way to share it with others.” I do love playing with computers and solving problems.

    After being an at-home other for years I took some computer courses at the local branch college to bring me up to speed. I was always creating challenges and having a great time meeting them. One day I came home and called for my daughter. No answer, so I figured she was out with her friends. No, an hour later she came out of her room.

    ME: “Oh, I didn’t know you were home.”
    KAITLIN: “I was afraid if I said anything you would start talking about computers again.”

    😀 You have to admit, that does deserve a laughing emoticon.

    Comment by Cheerful Monk — March 21, 2011 @ 22:01 | Reply

    • It does, Jean – deserve an emoticon. I myself heartbroken. Son makes useless teacher. Ask him anything and you will learn LESS than you thought you knew five minutes ago. Though comp will work again. Neither will he and I talk to each other for the next 76 seconds. Only shout. That’s me.

      Thanks for your offer. Despite my shortcoming of being UNable to accept help might make exception in this case. If only to irritate Con.

      On a side note: Have to reflect why I will always go way of biggest restistance. Drives me to despair. Never mind. If we can live with our own selves we can live with anyone. Other than me. But then there are rules to exceptions. Aren’t there?

      On another side note: Have just managed to burn lovingly chopped – at cost of time better employed to converse over here – both mushrooms and garlic. Burnt garlic is vile. Thank heavens for windows.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — March 21, 2011 @ 23:06 | Reply

      • Burnt hard boiled eggs are vile too. I burnt some when I was in high school. Was supposed to be boiling the eggs for supper and was studying my Spanish…in the kitchen…at the same time. Finally noticed the smell just before my mother came home. Opening the windows didn’t help. Her reaction? “How can anyone burn eggs and not notice the smell!” I was sorry she was upset but was also impressed by my powers of concentration. I loved her dearly, but we did have different values.

        Comment by Cheerful Monk — March 22, 2011 @ 00:30 | Reply

    • “If only to irritate Con.”

      And if he responds in a way you don’t like will you feel picked on?

      Comment by Cheerful Monk — March 22, 2011 @ 01:39 | Reply

  4. Actually I was an at-home mother, not other, although I suppose “other” works too.

    Comment by Cheerful Monk — March 21, 2011 @ 22:03 | Reply

    • ‘Other’ works brilliantly. Can’t stop grinning. Also glad that there are still women/mothers in this world who will be AT HOME.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — March 21, 2011 @ 23:21 | Reply

  5. Now we are getting our garlic in the peeled, naked bulbs in 5# sacks, which we use up pretty quickly. Might make us live longer. Tonight I think I’ll tell the Scottish dancers just so they know. Nobody will ask me to dance. But I like to dance with Tom anyway. He eats what I eat.

    Comment by bikehikebabe — March 22, 2011 @ 00:44 | Reply

  6. Please assure me that this is not a case of “Sic transit Gloria Ursula”……

    Comment by Magpie 11 — March 22, 2011 @ 11:06 | Reply

  7. Oh! I hadn’t realised that there were comments as well…..

    A blues fan? Me too… not a Blanket Mozart fan but have often wondered why so many people like his whole oeuvre then I heard a bloke on Radio 3 one Sunday morning saying that it’s because it’s so simple being very arpeggiated….isn’t that a lovely word….poor Mozart..what a childhood!

    Hey! What about “Tales from a Sore Headed Bear” wimk! wink!

    Comment by Magpie 11 — March 22, 2011 @ 11:27 | Reply

    • I understand arpeggio. Do you mean Mozart’s life was simple but in segments? Explain, please.

      Comment by bikehikebabe — March 22, 2011 @ 14:53 | Reply

    • When I was taking piano lessons as an adult my goal was to learn to play pieces Mozart wrote when he was 8. Came close but didn’t do it perfectly before life intruded and I went on to other things.

      Comment by Cheerful Monk — March 22, 2011 @ 19:55 | Reply

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