Bitch on the Blog

January 24, 2012


Filed under: Despair,Happiness — bitchontheblog @ 20:25

If you want witty please do change channel now.

Two and a half hours ago it was that time of the day (1754 GMT) when – the last two or three days –  dark thoughts descend on me. I don’t like it. Play me the blues to cheer me up, lift the cloud.

I wake up in the morning like the proverbial bird which has already caught her worm only to be chased by that hapless cat all day.  Come evening and I am less than enchanted with my harvest. Never mind. Mustn’t whinge. Americans like their glass half full even when half empty but then what’s a girl to do when a whole nation calls itself Pollyanna? It’s been, scientifically, verified – not that I couldn’t  have told you that for nothing – that ENFORCED optimism is not all it’s cracked up to be. My optimism is not enforced. It comes natural. Which means they figure that I am up there in the echelons of the deluded who think they are the bees’ knees, the milk’s cream or at least buttermilk.

Thus, before you see the bottom of your glass (or never put it to your lips – savers, stingers) please do not contemplate how full it is but its contents, and I paraphrase: “… water, Cider, a 19 something vintage Bordeaux, Gin and flat tonic,  hemlock”. Take your pick and don’t pollyanna me.




  1. Oh ! Go on Whinge…every other ****** does.

    My glass contained a slurp of a reasonable Argie Malbec at lunch time but it didn’t improve the over leeked Chicken, Mushroom and Leek pie that looked so tempting…..and it wasn’t inexpensive….

    !745? Wasn’t that one of the years that the ever whinging Scots had one of their rebellions? Enough to give anyone dark thoughts I should think.

    All that said…I think I know the feeling but the trigger for me is probably not the same as yours, whatever that is.

    Comment by magpie11 — January 24, 2012 @ 20:46 | Reply

    • Not so sure that leeks and mushrooms make good partners. Depends largely on how they are chopped. Leeks finely. Mushrooms chunky. Anyway it’s the sauce that counts. If I let get myself carried away we will discuss geese any moment now. One of them closely followed by a gander.

      I bow to your superior knowledge of Scottish history. I shall not google to verify whether you got your dates right. However, I’d like you to give me full marks to know about the one date that has stuck in my mind for longer than I care to remember: 1066 – William the Conqueror.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — January 25, 2012 @ 20:42 | Reply

  2. Listen up. The glass is neither half empty nor half full. It’s just too damned big!

    I’ll take a nice long pour of some fine Scotch with a few cubes of ice, and then I’ll toast to your indomitable spirit. What’s your pleasure?

    Save the hemlock for another day…

    Cheers indeed.

    Comment by Phil — January 24, 2012 @ 20:53 | Reply

    • ICE? With Scotch? Deadens the flavours (or taste buds).

      Realisation dawns…. ‘bye for now.

      Comment by magpie11 — January 25, 2012 @ 12:42 | Reply

      • Magpie, I know, I know! But years of guzzling down shots of Bourbon have caused my palate to crave the soothing cold whenever imbibing in er… enjoying the mashed and distilled spirits. Although I certainly wouldn’t turn down a nice two-finger pour, straight up. I can be flexible.

        Let me know how your “realization” turns out.

        Comment by Phil — January 25, 2012 @ 13:52 | Reply

    • What’s my pleasure, Phil? There are many: I am very fond of sunflowers, and daisies. Friendly faces. Yellow. If we stick to % volume I am anything white and extra dry. Send me to the desert now.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — January 25, 2012 @ 20:46 | Reply

  3. Dear Ursula,

    Looks as though I have somehow stamped on Nick’s corns (Nick from over on Nickhereandnow), as he has deleted our comments.claiming they were snide remarks. Goodness. First time I have ever been flamed. Clearly, only you and I have even the remotest sense of irony. Yet this Nick chappie writes so well, not even a misplaced comma or apostrophe. I envy him that though not his lack of patience. I think we had both already decided to take this over to our blogs.


    Hippo (Captain Gowans)

    Comment by Tom Gowans — January 24, 2012 @ 22:39 | Reply

    • We will, Captain Gowans, [take it to our blogs]. People who keep chickens in glasshouses, as Nick clearly does, shouldn’t grow corns. Beats me why he took offence.

      Am now in serious danger of doing that which I try to avoid as best I can because it’s painful (not for me): Expose. Exposing is what I am good at. And why, on the whole I try to keep my thoughts to myself. This minute I shall err on the side of wrapping Nick in cotton wool. Only for a minute. As a new post is in the making. Let’s see whether he is mouse or eats nuts.

      Hippo, it’s important to understand, and few people do: There is no need to set up camp. Stick with Nick (gosh, that rhymes) and talk to me. The two not mutually exclusive.

      Wish me luck. With what? Let’s wait and see.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — January 24, 2012 @ 23:17 | Reply

  4. I was thinking I need to cancel following this blog to save needed TiME. Now I’ll be looking up Scottish rebellion in 1745, since I go to Scottish dance every Monday night (for 30 years). Husband likes Scotch. Can’t think of anything worse tasting. My glass is always half empty, his is always full. He gets so much done in a day & loves every minute. It’s damn disgusting.

    Comment by bikehikebabe — January 24, 2012 @ 23:38 | Reply

    • As compliments go, Bike Hike Babe, I am flattered: If I manage to keep you from battling that which is surplus to your happiness (clearing the decks) I have achieved one thing in my life.

      Be thankful, grudgingly, to have Tom by your side. It could be worse.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — January 25, 2012 @ 20:49 | Reply

  5. No worries. Whinge away. I love to come here when I fancy a bit of weltschmerz.

    Comment by Maria from 'gaelikaa's diary' — January 25, 2012 @ 04:16 | Reply

    • Opps, Maria. I mean it’s Darn disgusting. Actually it’s pretty wonderful. He does all the cooking & he’s good.

      Comment by bikehikebabe — January 25, 2012 @ 05:44 | Reply

      • Stop apologizing, Cynthia. I am sure he is good. Otherwise I’d have to seriously doubt your palate.


        Comment by bitchontheblog — January 25, 2012 @ 20:57 | Reply

        • Heck, I don’t want to use swear words when Maria is here. She’s such a good person. She doesn’t deserve that.

          Comment by bikehikebabe — January 25, 2012 @ 21:01 | Reply

    • Well, thank you, gaelikaa. You are definitely missed by your absence. Only surpassed by my delight at hearing from you. Still, if I were Irish, had your MIL, four kids, a husband, lived in India, stray dogs to look after, and what not, I’d just lie down at interludes. And few people would know I even existed.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — January 25, 2012 @ 20:52 | Reply

  6. I’ll be the first to admit that I am one irrationally optimistic soul. But I wouldn’t say that is the national temperament in America. Quite the opposite. We have young people and no-so-young people escaping their lives via legal and illegal substances, voter apathy, disgust with our economic and political system, a lack of ability to speak with civility with each other even when we agree (which is rarely), and plain old crankiness. I feel like an island of optimism in a sea of pessimism (and the waves keep eroding my beaches).

    Maybe what I’m saying is that, while misery enjoys a great deal of company over here, I could use more company, too.

    Comment by Lorna's Voice — January 25, 2012 @ 14:21 | Reply

    • Comments used to be platitudes; ‘This is a lovely post.’ No fun to read. Ursula got us away from that. She allowed us to be genuine.
      Lorna, you are genuine & never boring.

      Comment by bikehikebabe — January 25, 2012 @ 18:09 | Reply

  7. gin always picks me up
    depressed or not!!!

    Comment by john — January 25, 2012 @ 18:24 | Reply

  8. You’ve probably caught on to the fact that I am a wine girl – grapes, vineyards, champagne, France – all topics at some point in my posts. It can be darkest in the empty half of the glass though, so I’m trying to keep mine with at least a little splash of something yet to come. I’m sending you a smile. Americans, for all of our optimism, love your witty banter and its edge.

    Comment by writingfeemail — January 26, 2012 @ 23:07 | Reply

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