Bitch on the Blog

April 16, 2012

Borrowed time

Filed under: Errors — bitchontheblog @ 08:31
Tags: , , , , , , ,

As you know I can be pretty scathing when people insist you stay “positive”. If sorrow and grief weren’t good for something then they wouldn’t be in our emotional spectrum. To deny either doesn’t take the pain away; and to be made to feel guilty about showing when something unsettles us is at best unkind and at worst cruel.

I will indulge, and I can’t say I commend myself for it, an occasional spot of morbidity. My drop dead gorgeous brother of three sisters got married in the summer of 1990. One of the guests was my father’s oldest friend. A wonderful man, one with a twinkle in his eye, affectionate, warm. In the group photograph taken, he is in the third tier, last one on the right. I am in the same row, last one on the left. A few years later my father’s friend died of cancer of the oesophagus. Let’s leave aside my totally irrational fear that should I hit cancer it will be that of the oesophagus. When I looked at that photograph and the symmetry of it I knew that  I’ll be the next (to drop). I actually dislike myself for that notion. Never have told my parents since it would distress them. In fact I haven’t told anyone till this moment. Trouble is: I have had premonitions before and I don’t like it when they come true. Insert smiley. In fact I hate it. At least if I were a witch when they were still burnt I could make some use of what amounts to a useless gift.

Yes, so start writing my obituary now.

Hugs, kisses and general despair,


PS As any journalist/wordsmith worth his whiskey will tell you: The message is in the FIRST paragraph. Forget the rest. Don’t expect to hold your readers’ attention.



  1. That first para is one of the reasons I like you……

    Where’s the picture then?

    Intriguing idea that you should hit cancer rather than the other way around….

    Take care

    Comment by David (magpie) — April 16, 2012 @ 09:44 | Reply

    • David, digging out the picture.

      There is a wonderful (and very short) poem by Bertolt Brecht, loosely translated (by me) as

      Title:To be read morning and evening:

      “The one who loves me told me that he needs me.

      Which is why I take care of myself, look where I am going and am afraid of any raindrop which may fell me.”


      Comment by bitchontheblog — April 16, 2012 @ 20:15 | Reply

      • Brecht had a habit of coming out with “bon mots”. (Google Translate gives me “gute Worte” which reminds me of brewing for some reason).
        I like it…

        Comment by David (magpie) — April 17, 2012 @ 13:38 | Reply

  2. It isn’t realistic to think we can stay positive one hundred percent of the time, nor is it healthy. As you point out in the first paragraph, we have emotions for a reason.

    Comment by writingfeemail — April 16, 2012 @ 10:36 | Reply

    • Renee, I can’t tell you how good it feels when someone confirms that roses come with thorns.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — April 16, 2012 @ 20:06 | Reply

  3. Oh, come on. The 1st paragraph is supposed to hook you into reading the rest of your brilliance. Otherwise, we might just as well start all 1st paragraphs with “The end.” (Which, in the case of this post, would be quite appropriate, wouldn’t it?) 😉

    Comment by Lorna's Voice — April 16, 2012 @ 17:24 | Reply

    • Yes, you are right. Why the hell didn’t I think of that: THE END.

      Sometimes I wonder why I started in the first place.

      Take it from me: Not everyone is a Lorna worthy to be read to whatever the end may be. I have lost count of the number of times I hit the keyboard with a “brilliant” thought only to have lost it by the time I have introduced it with my first paragraph. Which reminds me: How is the Short Story judging going? Are you sick and tired of words by now, or have the contestants still got you spellbound/laughing/shaking your head/wishing you’d never entered your services?


      Comment by bitchontheblog — April 16, 2012 @ 20:04 | Reply

  4. I live with someone who has a half full glass…. it an be waring but you are never disappointed by him

    Comment by finlaygray — April 16, 2012 @ 21:51 | Reply

    • John, from what I can tell by photogenic propensity to the lens Chris is indeed most fetching. If you are in awe of the last sentence so am I: How much more convoluted can one get?

      Now there are few statements that will raise my hackles as no chickens can, and that is the half full/half empty debate. Facts are facts: Let’s start with an EMPTY glass. Naturally, should you find it half full you’ll down it in one. With gratitude. If it’s full you can take it slowly. Till it’s half empty – and you’ll look at it with sorrow. Because all good things will come to an end. Unless you brew yourself whatever fills your glass.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — April 16, 2012 @ 22:15 | Reply

      • I knew I was on the right track with my mention of brewing!

        Comment by David (magpie) — April 17, 2012 @ 13:38 | Reply

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