Bitch on the Blog

April 18, 2012


Filed under: Happiness — bitchontheblog @ 14:57
Tags: , , , , , ,

Sweethearts, don’t be alarmed. I am not a hypochondriac (if only) but a spade is a spade even if it’s a fork.

At risk of repeating myself: I wish I knew the date of the day my bell will toll. I’d be so much happier. As it is the uncertainty of whether I’ll still be alive in half an hour does cause me many a minor panic. So much to do. And what can one do in half an hour? Not a lot. I bet my bottom Pound Sterling that I’ll still be around at, say, 92, still not having done all that needs to be done, only wondering why on earth I ever worried decades earlier. April 2012. 2012? YOU CAN’T BE SERIOUS. The ‘new’ millenium already 12 years in? YOU CAN’T BE SERIOUS. Soon we’ll be one hundred.




  1. Really? You want to know the date of your death? What’s the fun in that? Sure, you can plan a big soiree and that “to do” list takes on a different flavor, but I’d be so obsessed with that date, I’d probably lose my focus and step in front of a moving bus or something. Then I’d mess up the space-time continuum or karma or some natural/supernatural law and my soul would be…I shudder to think. I’d probably get reincarnated as a man or something.

    Comment by Lorna's Voice — April 18, 2012 @ 15:26 | Reply

    • Oh, yes, Lorna I’d like to know, roughly, when I’ll die. Doesn’t need to be exact to the hour.To know would give me such peace of mind in the interim. Bliss. Bloody bliss..I’d do what needs to be done happy in the knowledge that I most certainly won’t drop dead the next minute. And just before the time comes I’d even be able to have a shower, put on my favourite dress, lie down AND, most likely, get up again, declare I am not ready and that’s that.

      Death is a difficult subject to discuss. Most people don’t like it. I love death as long as it ignores me and everyone else. The enigma. As I have said before: Death never held a hand over me till I became a mother. For heaven’s sake I haven’t even yet shown my son how to iron a shirt. Putting it off day after day after day in the hope it’ll make me live longer is no good if you know all about blood clots. And then there are all the photographs to be sorted. Filing to be done. I can hardly leave the Angel with the leftover debris of my life, can I?

      As to you being reincarnated as a man: Have no fear, Lorna. Karma will catch up with you. I was once told, by a most reliable source, that in a previous life I was a man. British. Of all things. Into ballet. Like Kafka working during the day, writing at night. Lonely fellow. The clairvoyant was so vivid I nearly cried for the man I once was. Should he read this I sincerely hope he’ll be happy with how HIS Karma has reworked itself into the mesh of my life.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — April 18, 2012 @ 16:57 | Reply

      • So you came home then!

        Comment by David(magpie) — April 18, 2012 @ 18:57 | Reply

    • Don’t knock it Lorna…you could be reincarnated as a cabbage…according to one teacher i had: that is the the only thing worse in the scheme of things than being re-incarnated as…..guess what…… a woman. But then, I don’t believe in re-incarnation.

      Comment by David(magpie) — April 18, 2012 @ 18:54 | Reply

  2. Well, having been quite close, apparently, I can say that I have no recollection and certainly didn’t see a figure in shining white nor a tunnel with a bright white light at the far end so that’s alright.
    My fear is of going doolally and causing everyone difficulties for years prior to popping my clogs.
    Have just seen your comment about photographs…. at least three boxes of them some where…quite a problem there.
    I really must get around to making that CD of my funeral celebration…did I tell you that I want to conduct my own funeral? Would be fantastic fun….

    Comment by David(magpie) — April 18, 2012 @ 19:04 | Reply

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