Bitch on the Blog

July 20, 2012

Which way to go

Filed under: Despair — bitchontheblog @ 20:13
Tags: , , , , , ,

This minute I am faced with a choice. To let rip or to keep schtum. By temperament I prefer to fucking let rip. The voice of reason (that’s the Angel) has told me to not say a word to those words need to be said to. OK. He is probably right. Except that in a situation so bad it couldn’t be made worse I should allow myself to let rip. Am rewriting my will. Not that, this minute – a minute which could change any minute – do I have much to leave. Except a vial of verbal venom.

Let me know what you think. Or don’t bother. I have had it up to a level taller than myself. And I am not short.

If you do come to my funeral and insist on flowers please do make them sun/paeony/gerbera. If you are hard up just pick a dandelion or a daisy down the lane. I’d be deliriously happy with either of the last two.




  1. Ursula,

    Not sure how to respond here, as I’m not perfectly clear on the specifics, so let me speak in generalities. First it appears you at least had enough restraint to pull back enough from the situation and consult with the voice of reason. Good move at avoiding a situation where emotions may have clouded a measured response. If you must let rip, perhaps you may consider doing so on paper – full and complete with all the emotions that seem to be making your blood boil – no holds barred, in the form of a letter. Carefully address such letter to yourself, walk over to the post office, and mail it. Wait until said letter arrives. Hoping your postal system is as inefficient as ours is here, that it might take a few days. Use the few days to sleep on the matter and let the emotions drain away. When letter arrives, you decide whether it is worth opening and revisiting, or just another piece of junk mail to be tossed into the trash without further consideration.

    Let me know if I need to stand shoulder to shoulder with you to face an enemy, or if I just need to stand facing you, telling you to back off and stand down from a battle not worth fighting. Either way, I am there, as I am sure others will be there for you.

    Let’s let the dandelions and daisies live for now – no reason to go plucking them on your account. Hoping by the time this comment is posted, you’ve managed to sleep on whatever has ailed you.

    Comment by Phil — July 21, 2012 @ 04:54 | Reply

    • You are such a good person, Phil: “…consult with the voice of reason.”? You’ve got to be joking. I didn’t ‘consult’ – as such. The Angel happened to come back home just as I went ballistic in the aftermath of an email and a phone conversation I had had two minutes earlier. My aunt had died that afternoon (not her fault, it happens) and I just marvel at some factions of my family. Yes, so the Angel who has known me all his life and knows how to deal with me let the dust of my verbal outpouring settle, heard me out, said his piece. And I have to hand it to him: He’s got the Midas touch. I used to call him the cat whisperer because he managed to give our cats pills where I failed miserably. He’d ask me to leave the room and leave the ‘mission’ (and it was a mission) to him. How he did it I do not know but he did.

      Maybe the two of you should go into business together. You’d suit each other. I could be the dragon at the front desk. A veritable Miss Moneypenny, twin set, pearls, pencil skirt and stilettos. The one no one will get past, not even James Bond. Mind you, how that would help your business I do not know.

      So, yes, there I was all poised, fingers on keyboard, when – see your advice above – he said ‘write, don’t send’. I wrote and I didn’t send.

      What a level of sophistication your suggestion shows: I like receiving letters. As long as they are not from the taxman. Your so original idea is growing on me: Write myself a letter. How romantic. By the time I receive it I will be bemused. That’s why I love revisiting my blog. Weeks and months later. If I weren’t me already I’d love to be introduced to myself.

      Thanks for offering to stand side by side. or staring me right down the eye. You are right: Some battles are not worth the fight. But, by golly, Phil, how to apply theory in practice? An art which, so far, largely escapes me. Fight now, bleed later.

      Other than that:

      On the whole I am with you about not picking flowers. However, sometimes I do – on my way back from town. That which most people don’t even notice. Just ONE stem and put it into a tiny vase and onto my narrow windowsill (the one that runs along my desk. I hope it will get as much pleasure from being appreciated as it gives me every time I look up from the screen or my papers.


      PS Now all I need to do is attend to Androgoth – I think he feels neglected.

      Comment by Ursula — July 22, 2012 @ 13:25 | Reply

      • My attempt at humour is obviously lacking my friend
        but neglected? No I have no issues, have a very nice
        rest of weekend and hope you are okay…

        Androgoth XXx

        Comment by Androgoth — July 22, 2012 @ 22:24 | Reply

        • My dear Androgoth, your sense of humour is not lacking at all. All that lacks, not yet leaking, is me. I wrote you a finely chiseled answer to your LONG column (the irony of which not lost on me, or maybe it’s just my mind playing its tricks) and then what happened? I don’t know. Sometimes I give up the will when my words disappear into the big wide heaven of blogs’ Babylon hanging like a heavy cloud over our overwrought minds.

          To summon up: Yes, I could do with a massage. Not least because I am tense all over by imagining you and Phil doing a balloon dance together. No doubt a sight to behold and to be kept on uTube for prosperity and the benefit of your respective grandchildren.. You, the Goth, may just get your balloons together (black and red?) and I will laugh and applaud you in a benign, appreciative way. But I’d like to think of Phil as dignified. A man who doesn’t need to blow his balloon.

          Brilliant. It’s only 0836 GMT and I have already excelled myself.


          Comment by Ursula — July 24, 2012 @ 07:35 | Reply

  2. Wow Phil that was a long one,
    but I will pick us a few dandelions
    to take over there, of course we
    won’t be placing them anywhere
    apart from directly into Ursula’s
    hands, sitting her down and in
    no order in particular give her a
    really good spanking…

    How do you mean what were
    the other items on the agenda?

    Well first of all she needs a nice
    massage, noooo not from you nor
    myself but we will take along one
    of those manly slaves that she is
    fantasising about (Joking U) and
    let him loose with the oils, wicked
    potions and his naughty thoughts
    this should relax her enough to be
    hypnotically entertained by our next
    offering, which is a balloon dance
    of all wicked proportions, don’t be
    alarmed Phil I will give instructions
    on how to dance without flashing
    any bare flesh, oh yes and trying
    not to let anyone burst the balloons.
    The next phase is to tie her down
    and use those feathers on her, it’s
    not as kinky as you might think but
    it will definitely bring Ursula out of
    her trance, she will immediately be
    recollecting our smiley’s on one of
    her recent postings and we will be
    lucky to escape without showing
    our bits and pieces, but hey what
    are friends for? Okay Ursula it is
    time to pop those dandelions into
    some water before they start to
    droop… Yes the dandelions…

    Androgoth XXx

    Comment by Androgoth — July 21, 2012 @ 23:35 | Reply

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