Bitch on the Blog

August 1, 2012


Filed under: Style — bitchontheblog @ 09:48
Tags: , , , , , ,

The jury is still out though I have cast my vote: What’s the uglier joint? The knee or the elbow?

Considering that few photographs of you will be taken from behind, the knee wins hands down. Don’t get me wrong: I do appreciate the knee. Without it we wouldn’t be able to walk, sit down, crouch or do much of anything. Just had reason to contemplate this (again) when looking at one of my nephews’ official photographs on occasion of taking his A’Levels. The girls at age 18 – looking like tarts or Stepford wives in the making (and before you say anything I am very fond of tarts – they are street wise, do have big hearts and will accommodate any of your fancies; just don’t slit their throats, please).

Most of the girls got it right. Just that little bit of skirt to cover the knee. The one in the middle, front row, got it so wrong she most likely will have torn up the print already. And will wish facebook had never been invented. There for posterity. I pity her future children. A fashion faux pas if ever there was one. If I were her mother I’d hide in the closet and slash my jumpsuits.

Once upon a time my claim to fame was recorded in the school magazine: The shortest skirts in the vicinity (my mother had bought them for me). How did the copy read: “Attention. Here comes Ursula. Do not blush. Look away. If you must.” To this day I have no idea how one can cause so much with so little. However, my mini skirts and hot pants served an important purpose: Diverting the eye from the knee. Setting your sights higher.




  1. I’ll never forget mini skirts.
    I had on a mini skirt when I went out on the balcony in freezing weather. (We store our leftovers there in the winter.) The door closed behind me & LOCKED because I forgot to set it to Unlock.

    I had to jump up & down for 2 hours before my 1st piano student came through the front door, which was unlocked.

    Comment by bikehikebabe66 — August 1, 2012 @ 18:30 | Reply

    • I feel for you, Bike Hike Babe. Laughing at the same time. I’d have probably either abseiled or just sat down hugging my legs tightly to my chest.

      Funny thing is, and it amuses me to this day, whilst my mother positively encouraged the shortest of skirts she was most insistent on my wearing those strange thermal tubes around my lower back to protect my kidneys from the cold. In winter. She believed that not only would keeping my kidneys warm spare me bladder infections but keep my fertility intact. The latter a most alarming prospect. The last thing you want in your late teens, early twenties is to be fertile.

      So, you play the piano, do you?


      Comment by bitchontheblog — August 1, 2012 @ 23:44 | Reply

      • Organ–excuse the expression, was my college major. Don’t like church music with all the notes running together like honey. Give me Rock & Bach.

        Comment by bikehikebabe66 — August 1, 2012 @ 23:53 | Reply

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