Bitch on the Blog

July 22, 2013


Filed under: Beauty — bitchontheblog @ 09:11

I know it’s politically incorrect. However.

The camera’s lens can be cruel. And some people do not photograph well.  There was an absolute shit shot even of Kate Moss the other day. I felt for her. If I were her I’d shoot myself in the wake of that photo. In fact I’d shoot myself all over the place if I looked like some people. And I am not even vain. Or photogenic.

Don’t hate me. I am not Dorian Gray with my portrait in the loft. Not at all. I am critical. And I see what I see. Was in a bind recently, and not for the first time: A person, younger than me, tells me their age. Confidences ideally being reciprocated I tell them mine. This is the stuff of comedy: They don’t believe me: “But you look at least ten years younger than me.” I agree. I do. However, I can’t say that, can I: “Yes, me too. Going by your …….. I thought you were at least seven years older than me.” That’s why biting your tongue was invented.

Men age well; if anything men are often more attractive in old age. I, woman, only age well because I am genetically blessed and because I kept out of the sun all my life apart from twice. What’s the acid test to a woman’s ‘perceived’ age? Do you know? It’s very simple. But then the simple is not always obvious. Let me know.




  1. 1. Thank you.

    2. Why should it matter? From 19, in India that it when a woman is legally an adult, to 90, in India, women very rarely live beyond, they are women. At least for me they are.

    Comment by Rummuser — July 22, 2013 @ 11:32 | Reply

    • Am in mischievous mood this and any other minute. So will keep thoughts to myself.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 23, 2013 @ 03:53 | Reply

  2. When I look in the mirror I don’t see myself as either beautiful or ugly (clearly I’m neither) but just me. And I don’t waste any time pulling myself to bits. I’m forever mystified that so many women look in the mirror and are totally dissatisfied with everything they see. How depressing and dreary that must be. And yes, the camera lies all the time. Some extremely beautiful people are so unphotogenic that photos of them are almost always unflattering.

    Comment by nick — July 22, 2013 @ 11:56 | Reply

    • I never look in the mirror. I find a pond.

      “Pulling myself to bits”. Sorry, I am laughing, Nick: The only things that I pull to bits are well done chicken drumsticks and lamb shanks.

      To be serious for a moment: Yes, it is odd, and maybe the likes of Annie Leibovitz could shed light on it: Why do some people photograph better than others? Poignant for me: There was brief chapter in my life, and looking at photos of that time, I barely recognize myself. Not, of course, that we are the best to recognize ourselves.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 23, 2013 @ 04:10 | Reply

  3. Basing my judgment purely on your avatar, I always had you pegged as an eighty year old, bitter and twisted harridan.

    I could be wrong of course.

    Comment by Tom Gowans — July 22, 2013 @ 12:23 | Reply

    • Couldn’t agree more, Tom.

      That photo, my avatar, was taken by a painstaking painter, LSF (longest standing friend), in gallery, Basel/Switzerland. Mid morning. I don’t get headaches. Ever. But was slightly overhung from the previous night’s vernissage. In fact, if someone had asked me to bend over I’d declined. Doesn’t show, does it? That’s class.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 23, 2013 @ 03:45 | Reply

  4. You reminded me of something I heard Martha Stewart say. Someone commented on her skin, saying it was lovely. She said, “Yes, it is.” I laughed like crazy. Why is it when someone agrees to a complement, we think it is vain or arrogant? She must not have heard the tongue-biting suggestion.

    Comment by reneejohnsonwrites — July 23, 2013 @ 01:04 | Reply

    • Not that I gave it much thought, though do remember: My second husband once remarked that it’s impossible to pay me a compliment without me brushing it aside. Yes. Pause. I know my worth. Don’t need validation. Ungrateful. Nay, ungracious. For which I, unreservedly, apologize.

      Trying to mend my ways,

      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 23, 2013 @ 03:51 | Reply

  5. Women tend to think they look younger & thiner than they really are. You have to have a comparison like a young person standing with you at the mirror.

    Comment by bikehikebabe66 — July 23, 2013 @ 02:37 | Reply

    • Once when I was about 40 I thought I looked great. I stood behind a 20 year old putting on her lipstick at the mirror & I got a rude awakening. She had an advantage besides youth. She was drop-dead gorgeous.

      Comment by bikehikebabe66 — July 23, 2013 @ 03:09 | Reply

      • Not quite sure how to answer, Cynthia. Nothing much comes to mind. At 40 I am sure you still looked great. As you probably do now. My mother is 80 and you wouldn’t believe it. It’s incredible. Of course, as I keep saying: It’s all in the genes and your cheek bones. Ask Marlene Dietrich. Or Ingrid Bergman. That’s why it pays to have those slightly Eastern European features. Otherwise be of a dark skin colour. So forgiving of the ravages of age. Whatever you do: Never be Mick Jagger. Keith Richards will do. Grand Canyon.


        Comment by bitchontheblog — July 23, 2013 @ 04:23 | Reply

  6. Hmm – not without trepidation do I enter into this fray. I think men and women age about the same but perceptions of that aging vary wildly. I find women who obsess about their looks far less appealing than those comfortable in their own skin. And at my age I’d rather look at Helen Mirren than most of the current stable of young entertainment industry so-called hotties – though I will make an exception for Missy Peregrym . Ahem. And, men have the advantage of being able to grow beards to cover up some of those perceived flaws. I suppose perceptions are tainted by our standards of beauty too. Too bad Hollywood sets such phony standards with all of the surgical mods and what not – LOL.

    Comment by Chuck McConvey — July 23, 2013 @ 17:02 | Reply

    • Other than Charles you have come closer than previous commentators to answering my question.

      I googled Missy Pergrym who I had not heard of before. Well, what can I say? I am sure she is worth her weight in pennies when meeting her in the flesh.

      Looking at her face I have a thought. Too personal to voice here.

      Standards of beauty, Chuck? There was Rubens. Now there is Kate Moss. In between women had a decolletage, Renaissance men wore ravishing shirts and trousers, and generally the world was (and is) varied. We latch onto each other for many reasons. Glad to report that, yesterday, I had another Marilyn Monroe moment. That skirt will be my undoing.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 24, 2013 @ 14:16 | Reply

      • I suspect you are correct in that thought – not surprised you picked up on it in fact

        Comment by Chuck McConvey — July 28, 2013 @ 15:45 | Reply

  7. “What’s the acid test to a woman’s ‘perceived’ age?”

    Count the rings? On her fingers, I mean.

    Comment by bronxboy55 — July 24, 2013 @ 11:09 | Reply

    • Not bad, Charles. Funny and perceptive. As you are. I only have one ring. A big, yet subtle, beauty. I rarely wear it, and when I do it’s on my left forefinger. Startles people. No one ever comments on it. Probably too much in the face. Bought it for and by myself.

      So Liz Taylor I ain’t. Give me Richard Burton’s voice any day.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 24, 2013 @ 14:02 | Reply

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