Bitch on the Blog

August 7, 2013

Richard Gere

Now for something else: Fashion. No, forget fashion. Style. Style. Either you’ve got it or you don’t.

I love orange – which, by all accounts, is currently de rigeur. Particularly in places where there is little choice. I have a coat dress orange and black. If I were fat I could go to a fancy dress ball in it and pass as a pumpkin.

You cannot open so much as a paper (no, not a magazine, a paper) without being given some rules. Today, guys, it’s your turn. To wear or not to wear that is the question when meeting your destiny.

Vests are for wife beaters. Apparently. That’s fair enough. Beating your wife is hard work and one needs to keep well ventilated. Unfortunately, the only thing that springs to my mind when I hear ‘vest’ is the rather gorgeous Marlon Brando in “A Streetcar named desire”. I shan’t tell you that my father is a Brando look-a-like since you might get the wrong idea. Particularly those Freuds among you.

What else? The other 24 tips are rubbish. Wear whatever when going swimming. I won’t judge you. Hats are good. Though polo shirts – not sure about them. In my book they can look a little naff. Linen suits are good only if you are Klaus Maria Brandauer in “Out of Africa”.

There is one sin and it is cardinal, unforgivable and your feet should be chopped off by no one lesser than Anna Wintour: Socks and sandals. Socks and sandals are as sexy as, I don’t know, let me think, what’s less sexy than socks and sandals? Give me time. I might come up with an idea.

U

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7 Comments »

  1. Belt and braces.

    Comment by Rummuser — August 7, 2013 @ 14:37 | Reply

    • Yes, and no, Ramana. I know men are being ridiculed for playing it safe that way. I myself find the belts and braces approach rather endearing. After all: Who wants their trousers to fall down? Ask me, a woman who checks every time she sets foot out of the door whether her skirt is tucked inside her knickers. The ultimate humiliation. Marking you as particularly absent minded. If nothing else.

      Well, better safe than sorry.

      U

      Comment by bitchontheblog — August 8, 2013 @ 04:01 | Reply

      • I found it very interesting that John Major used to, and perhaps still does, tuck his shirt inside his underwear!

        Comment by Rummuser — August 8, 2013 @ 15:31 | Reply

        • Malicious gossip. He doesn’t. I have this on excellent authority. Norma wouldn’t allow him setting foot out of the house.

          U

          Comment by bitchontheblog — August 8, 2013 @ 17:19 | Reply

  2. Orange?
    Socks and sandals…. As a child I had to wear socks with my sandals hence I cannot undersand what is wrong with the pairing. Given the repulsive appearance of most human feet then wearing socks with sandals is positively doing the world a great favour.

    Something that I personally cannot abide is the wearing of jackets, particularly good English blazers, with denim jeans. The wearing of three, or even two, piece suits without a tie is revolting. If you dislike wearing a tie then go in shirt sleeve order and roll your sleeves up from the cuff.

    I once taught a few classes of French teenagers at an International School and was always impressed witht he quality of casual dress of the young men compared with the English peers. This was back in 1969 and since thenit seems that the dress sense of the average Englishman has decllined further. I see groups of people going out for an evening, whether to the theatre, a concert , what passes for a cinema in this day and age or for a “bite to eat” and the women and girls wil have done their best to dress attractively yet their men cannot even be bothered to try to compliment their womenfolk’s appearance.

    All that said, there are some gruesome sights around amongst the females of the species.

    Or is it that I am just old fashioned?

    Comment by magpie11 — August 7, 2013 @ 15:35 | Reply

    • Orange? I can see that my thinly veiled allusions to politics and policies make no dent on my readers.

      Magpie, I agree about some gruesome sights of the female form. I am the first to faint, or at least avert my eyes, when I come across them. Truth be told: I am unforgiving. However, we were talking about men’s fashion.

      Feet? I don’t find feet repulsive. They just need to be looked after like any other part of the body. Maybe it is a peculiarly English thing, socks and sandals. Just as tights/stockings with open shoes for a woman is a fashion faux pas on these isles – witnessed many a time. Can’t believe it. Hosiery goes with closed shoes. Open shoes’ feet go naked. One could, of course, as the press did here a little while ago, get all steamed up about Italian men wearing shoes, no socks. But then they do it so well, don’t you think?

      Blazer/denim combo? Seen it worn to great effect. Depends how it hangs on you. Hence my Richard Gere reference. Anything hangs well off him.

      U

      Comment by bitchontheblog — August 8, 2013 @ 17:29 | Reply

  3. Orange is the color of creativity–very apt. I have to agree with you on socks and sandals. Not alluring at all. Striped shirts with plaid Bermuda shorts make me look (or run) the other way…

    Comment by Lorna's Voice — August 12, 2013 @ 13:53 | Reply


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