Bitch on the Blog

April 1, 2014


Filed under: Errors — bitchontheblog @ 17:25
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A word of warning: Today is April’s Fool Day. When the Angel left the house this morning I told him to be vigilant. Not that he is as naive as his mother (‘naive’ being the polite version of  ‘gullible’). There are people who can play pranks and then there are people like me who clearly lack both imagination and inclination to trip up others and laugh at their cost. Which is why, without fail, I’ll fall for others’ little ‘jokes’.

Come to think of it, and it wasn’t even the 1st of April, some balmy evening in Cyprus, accompanying FOS on a business trip, him working behind the scene, delegates assembling in the lobby. Closest I have ever come to being sexually assaulted, in public. Swiss guy. Middle aged. Elegant, impeccably dressed. He addressed me. And then he roared with laughter. I didn’t understand why he laughed. When I asked another guy, closer to my own then young age, to explain he blushed. Refused to expand. After dinner Mr Swiss took it one step too far. And suddenly the earlier incident clicked into place. I understood ok. I didn’t say anything since my husband was busy enough with the conference. Just retreated to our room. Word got out (as I said there had been witnesses on both occasions).  Oh dear, there are two types of men you don’t mess with: One are husbands and the other Cypriots, or any other man on the planet. When their women are compromised they go ballistic. And ballistic both FOS and his ground agent on Cyprus went. Mega. Any attempt of mine to diffuse the situation was met with “Just keep out of it”.  Still makes me smile. The actual ‘offence’ wasn’t a particularly big deal to me. Mark it off to experience.  FOS took it right to the top of the hosting company’s chairman. My oh my. What a stink. Mr Swiss apparently got the bollocking (!) of a life time. He did apologize to my husband. I have no idea why I find strands of this story funny, not least the last one. But I do.

Yes, pranks. Some are funny. Some not so much. Some will backfire. Today? So far so good. Another six hours to go and I will let my guard down. For any of you to walk straight into an open door.



  1. Well, in England, if you try to pull an April 1st prank after midday you are the April Fool. Or so tradition says.

    Comment by magpie11 — April 1, 2014 @ 17:32 | Reply

  2. I quite enjoy bogus stories in the media (I was fooled by a supposed Scottish pound coin with Alex Salmond on it), but actual real-life pranks are just embarrassing.

    I’m glad Mr Swiss got a good bollocking; too many men get away with the most outrageous advances because their male colleagues close ranks.

    Comment by nick — April 1, 2014 @ 17:42 | Reply

    • You have to be genius to pull off real life pranks, Nick. My mother, sister of many brothers on either side of the age spectrum, is the devil herself. She does have a mischievous streak. All in good humour, nothing that hurts. This year she clearly lacks the strength to bother. Let’s hope I don’t speak too soon.

      Yes, male colleagues may close ranks. I, and few women I have worked with, have never been at the receiving end. In the case I described, the client company was embarrassed. To the hilt. However, don’t you find it interesting that whilst feeling a little soiled and humiliated that I didn’t really want to press the issue? I have my pride. So, despite my husband urging me to have room service I made a point to appear at breakfast downstairs – in front of the whole congregation.

      Let them blush.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — April 1, 2014 @ 17:59 | Reply

  3. How would you like to read your own obituary in the newspaper with a grinning photograph to boot! Two of my friends ganged up and pulled this one on me on April1. 1962. One of them subsequently became my brother in law and died a premature death. No he did not die a premature death because his sister married me.

    Comment by Rummuser — April 2, 2014 @ 01:25 | Reply

    • Sounds a great prank to me. What I now would like to know: What did it say? And did you, I think Mark Twain did, counter by publishing: “News of my premature death are greatly exaggerated.”?

      Glad you live to tell many a tale, Ramana.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — April 2, 2014 @ 06:32 | Reply

  4. It simply said that Ramana Rajgopaul unexpectedly passed away in a road accident on March 31,1962, below my photograph with a tie on.

    Comment by Rummuser — April 2, 2014 @ 14:29 | Reply

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