Bitch on the Blog

June 8, 2014


Filed under: High Finance,Human condition — bitchontheblog @ 13:40

Have come across (to my mind) awful notion on the “art” of  saying no. Yes, Ramana, your last post. To say no – in my life’s experience – does come easy to most. Very easy. Too easy.

The life affirming are those who say YES. And do. With no immediate discernible exchange in the bargain.




  1. You have to live in India and be Indian to understand that phenomenon Ursula. Most Indians are conditioned from childhood to be doormats.

    Comment by rummuser — June 8, 2014 @ 14:02 | Reply

    • I take your point as best I can, Ramana, given the cultural differences. Saying indiscriminately ‘yes’ out of fear of not being liked, not meeting approval, is, of course, sad.

      However, saying ‘yes’ does not make anyone a doormat. A couple of people who said yes to me (I hadn’t even asked) are most certainly not doormats – and shall stay in my heart not only on their personal merit but for the fact they took action when it was needed. With no immediate discernible benefit to them.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — June 8, 2014 @ 14:20 | Reply

  2. Incidentally, saying no is no big deal. It is the emotional baggage that one carries after the event that is the problem. Guilt, shame etc, just like my friend tried to instill in me. It is garden variety emotional blackmail in my glorious mother land. Affirmative action as you suggest is to say yes to my son’s workshop on a Saturday morning, and bask in the glorious affection of a dozen young people all curious about the old codger attending a session with them.

    Comment by rummuser — June 8, 2014 @ 14:06 | Reply

    • I agree. It is the emotional baggage. And I wish more people would carry it rather than palming it off. I am going through one bastard of a time with my siblings at the moment. You want avoidance? Don’t try to talk to my siblings. They are experts at blaming everyone but themselves for the shit holes they have dug for themselves. And their kids. It’s quite fantastic.

      Sorry, Ramana. Not exactly lady like language. I am incensed this minute. Incensed. Good job I am hundred of miles away or I’d bang some heads together to put sense where it belongs.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — June 8, 2014 @ 14:26 | Reply

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