Bitch on the Blog

July 21, 2014

Crown Court

Filed under: Amusement — bitchontheblog @ 13:58
Tags: ,

Sweethearts, I am so excited (and yes, I do know there are many comments and posts of yours to be answered):

Just opened today’s post and what do you know: Dear dead dog in heaven, I have been summoned to do Jury Service in September. It’s going to be awful. That old black and white movie whatever it’s called will have nothing on me keeping everyone in suspense. Let’s hope it’s a shut and cut case.

Of even more interest, maybe, that I have a “Juror’s Number” and the letter is printed in pink.  Why pink? The forerunner to a red letter? Blood? Don’t get started, Magpie. If I want a lecture on anything I’ll phone my father.




  1. I am happy for you. This will be a grand experience.

    Comment by rummuser — July 21, 2014 @ 15:23 | Reply

    • Thank you, Ramana. I am not looking forward to it. My trouble is, as has often been pointed out to me not least by my father and my son, that I do get emotionally affected by OTHER people’s plight very easily. That doesn’t make me Mother Theresa. Quite the opposite. Mother Theresa must have had skin as thick as leather to cope with her daily load.

      I am a practical person. So I always want to DO something about a problem. Trouble is I tend to route for the underdog. Makes me smile in many ways: Can you imagine me as a lawyer in court? No, neither can I. Depending on what I think I’d either send the defendant to hell or try and save him at all cost. As cool as a cucumber I ain’t. Probably the reason I am so very fond of cucumbers.

      But yes, as you and Magpie say, it will be an experience. And since I don’t collect anything other than ‘experiences’ I’ll add this one to my collection – with trepidation.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 22, 2014 @ 01:55 | Reply

  2. Lecture?

    I was going to say that I enjoyed my Jury service……. I got lots of reading done and was involved in trying two cases.

    Comment by magpie11 — July 21, 2014 @ 18:23 | Reply

    • Did meet some interesting people too.

      Comment by magpie11 — July 21, 2014 @ 18:27 | Reply

    • Lecture? Sorry, Magpie. don’t take it the wrong way. I am always happy to learn. And, according to my mother, I am the most patient student in the world. You couldn’t ask my father the square root of anything without him starting with Pythagoras first. Three hours later … my mother would wade in and say to him “enough is enough”. She has always maintained that of all their children I was the only one who listened to him attentively (and, to this day, he is worth listening to) whilst my siblings let it all wash over them – into one ear out of the other. After ten minutes they left under some pretext. And I believe my father gave up with them after a while. But then I expect that you, as a teacher, know all about what I am alluding to.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 22, 2014 @ 02:05 | Reply

      • The most succesful way to teach is to entertain, I found. That’s no longer allowed it seems. But actuallyit’s all about the student learning…

        Comment by magpie11 — July 24, 2014 @ 11:33 | Reply

  3. That must mean that you have a British passport. Bah.
    When I told them I have a German passport, am a German national and always will be, they quickly withdrew the order.

    A bit of a turncoat, are you?

    Comment by friko — July 22, 2014 @ 07:03 | Reply

    • I am no turncoat, Friko. I am the holder of one passport and one passport only. Namely the one I was born with. Even if I had wanted to hold dual nationality (which I don’t) the motherland wouldn’t have allowed it. At the time it was an either/or. They have since changed their tune (falling birth rate – I believe). I registered my son, born in England, with the authorities in Berlin (meaning that he has two birth certificates) and, yes, the motherland allows him to hold two passports.

      Your point is a good one. And made me read all the bumph they sent with the “Summons”. The criteria nothing to do with nationality (in fact one of the sheets attached is in several indecipherable to me languages like Chinese, and in Polish which I can read). The criteria being that you are over 18 and under 70. That you are compos mentis. That you are not with one foot in prison yourself (on bail), and that you have lived in the UK for more than five years. On the last count I am guilty as charged. Bloody hell, I have spent most my adult life here. Other than that I need to renew said passport and am thus currently prisoner on these isles. Unless I can prove that one of my parents is dying or has already in which case the embassy will fast forward your application. My dear Friko, the mills of what I call Bureau Crazy are turning slowly indeed. And they want your fingerprints. Which for some reason has slowed down my effort at renewal…


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 22, 2014 @ 07:57 | Reply

      • We seem to have a lot in common. One passport and one passport only, for me too. Also a passport which expired more than 12 months ago. Hence, we share the prisoner like state of being. More than 5 years in the UK? God, five? Most of my adult life too. What happened there? Actually, I found a second British husband, t should have thought of the implications before I married him.

        The only difference seems to be that I was excused jury service on the grounds of being a bloody foreigner. Nay, forbidden jury service.

        What’s with the Motherland? Has it stopped being the Fatherland?

        Comment by friko — July 24, 2014 @ 09:44 | Reply

        • How did I miss your reply till today?

          Yes, Friko, I believe we do “have a lot in common”. And not just the sorry state of our passports.

          “What’s with the Motherland”? I call it that because my son is half this and half the other. Despite having grown up here his leanings tend to be to the other. Excluding Sauerkraut. Which I should have force fed him when I still had the chance. Still, never say never. I could dress it up as Choucroute Garnie. Him being a carnivore.

          Come to think of it, and I believe you alluded to it in one of your posts: Whilst I have a very strong bond with “Heimat” (wherever that is – I don’t know) I am at home anywhere. In a sort of detached yet committed way.

          Other than that, Friko, thank you for reminding me of “fatherland”. Not least because it’s my father’s birthday today (1st August) so I’ll better phone him once my parents’ coffee hour comes to a close. 77.


          Comment by bitchontheblog — August 1, 2014 @ 14:27 | Reply

  4. I wrote an article once on my jury service. I never got selected but the jury room (huge) was an incredible experience and I felt so honoured at just spending the week in a micro-universe, free from the outside world.
    Perspective is everything.

    Comment by wisewebwoman — July 22, 2014 @ 13:51 | Reply

    • You are right, “perspective is everything”. However, I don’t like the idea of deciding over someone else’s life. Particularly if the offence was just shop lifting. What do I know what drives anyone to anything?

      Reminds me of my father, who as a young man did his army service with the Navy. At the end of which they offered him what is called, loosely translated, “officer’s patent”. He declined on the grounds that he had no desire to make decisions on behalf of other men (resulting in their possible loss of life). Many years later, and Friko might find this mildly amusing, he wrote a character reference for my then boyfriend who refused to do the prescribed eighteen months army drill. They called it (possibly still do, I don’t know) “conscientious objector”. In those days you had to prove your case (in court). My father wrote the most amazing (and short) letter citing Kant’s categorical imperative. My boyfriend (later husband) “won” and was put on community service instead. With a catastrophic result. But that’s another story.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 23, 2014 @ 09:18 | Reply

  5. I’ve been on jury service twice and it was very interesting finding out from the inside how a jury deliberates. I was very impressed by how seriously they took the task. I’m all agog to hear how you get on!

    Comment by nick — July 22, 2014 @ 14:56 | Reply

    • Dear Nick, I believe it to be a task to be taken very “seriously” indeed. People’s lives veer out over nothing. That is why we are responsible for each other.

      “Agog”? I’ll keep you posted. Other than that: Couldn’t have come at a worse time (in terms of other commitments I have entered). Never mind. Main thing in life is to go with the flow and live with the fallout.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — July 23, 2014 @ 09:22 | Reply

  6. As a sociologist, I just love jury duty. I find the whole process a study in human social interaction under very constrained conditions and it’s quite fascinating. With your observant eye, I’m sure you’ll have plenty of insights to share with us… 😉

    Comment by Lorna's Voice — July 23, 2014 @ 16:04 | Reply

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