Bitch on the Blog

September 4, 2014


Filed under: Communication,Despair — bitchontheblog @ 15:14
Tags: ,

Let me throw myself at your collective shoulder. I have declared war on a British paper.

It is a paper – of repute – which appears to specialize in feminism. So far, so boring. Today I left two comments in reply to an inane (not that I used that word) article written by an ardent feminist. You know the sort: The sort you’d pity any son they might have. Remember, I am a woman. So, I, woman, gets moderated at the rate of knots by answering (see above) another woman for critically questioning her take on men. There was not a swearword in sight, just reason. The “moderator” threw me out. Twice.

I am only telling you this because I am frustrated. I am an (investigative)  journalist’s daughter. I come from a hugely argumentative household. Exchange of  opinions, outlook on life, welcomed. And then you get some of the great names of what once was Fleet Street to shut you up? Forget it. From now on I shall follow the Angel’s somewhat tiresome but probably good advice: “Why are you doing this to yourself, Mama? Just leave it.” Yes, indeed. Why engage when one could just keep shtum? Swallow shit, die of colon cancer later.

So very disappointed with mankind. No, forget MANkind. So disappointed with ‘feminists’. Next they’ll burn books (written by men). For fuck’s sake …



Belated PS, this is what I wrote:

“I am a woman. Sorry, [name of columnist], but sometimes one needs to make clear what gender one is. Not least in your column when every slightly questioning response is assumed to be that of a man.

I have clicked many a recommend on previous, and critical, comments – possibly made by men. Who knows. With women commentators jumping down the throats of sa(i)d guys. Let’s just say I am glad that, currently, I am not a man. Which is not the same as saying that I am not ashamed about some aspects of my gender. Can you, so called feminists, just for once shut up and listen. No one is after your hide. Shit happens. Sure. But stop generalizing, stop measuring all men with the same yard stick. It’s so tiresome, so embarrassing (to me as a woman). Just get on with your day job, your life, stop being so resentful whilst expecting YOUR man (poor sausage) to read your mind and know when to put the rubbish out and
generally making himself useful. Be an example to your daughters AND sons by stopping whining. Just DO as you want to be done by.

Don’t widen the gender divide. Close the gap. And don’t lay all the work to do so at men’s thresholds.”

On being ‘deleted’ I sent the following. Naturally deleted too.

“Do not be a woman (as I am) and write a somewhat critical comment in reply to [name of commentator] take on feminism. You will be modified. Nay, moderated. Nay, deleted. So much for “feminism”: Fit the hole or you’ll sink without trace.”



  1. My understanding is that a “feminist” is someone who is mad at God for having been born female. Even though their arguments may seem directed at you, they are really directed upwards. Thus, to argue with a feminist is to insert yourself into a dispute that you aren’t a party to.

    Comment by Looney — September 4, 2014 @ 15:36 | Reply

    • Oh, Looney, at times your reasoning is so soothing as to wipe that furrow off between my brows.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — September 5, 2014 @ 03:55 | Reply

  2. Future D in Law and you would get on well…. she loathes most feminists… especially those with platforms in newpapers and on the radio. Radio 4; 10am weekdays….. yes, I listen……

    Comment by magpie11 — September 4, 2014 @ 19:57 | Reply

    • I should have defined feminists as “Female feminists”

      Comment by magpie11 — September 4, 2014 @ 19:58 | Reply

    • I am sure your future DIL and I would get on well. However, there is always one question: WHY [do you loathe something]? Excuse me for the moment lest I go further down that road of thought. This minute I am reminded (apropos Radio Four at 10 – a programme I haven’t listened to for years) of good old Jenny Murray’s intention to have her stomach clamped.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — September 5, 2014 @ 04:01 | Reply

  3. Hard to comment on this as you aren’t specific about what you’re objecting to and why. You just seem to have a grudge against feminists and (presumably) the Guardian.

    And the only people burning books right now are Islamic fundamentalists. Feminists have never burnt any books as far as I know.

    Comment by nick — September 4, 2014 @ 20:10 | Reply

    • I am specific, Nick. Do I have what you call “a grudge against feminists”? I bear no grudge other than to those of a narrow mind. Those who willfully stoke fires to divide instead of unite. What I am objecting to, namely, that feminists deem themselves above criticism. Particularly from other women. Or when they mistake you, the commentator, for a man. So your comment will be deleted. Next time I’ll check in as an elephant or a (male chauvinistic) pig. Not that feminists are famous for their sense of humour.

      They won’t burn books? Mark my words, Nick: People with a cause and a narrow outlook will burn anything. Books, houses, themselves.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — September 5, 2014 @ 03:41 | Reply

      • I can’t see why they deleted your comments. They’re not at all offensive or nasty or threatening. But you do seem to dismiss all feminists as carping idiots. Yes, some of them jump down people’s throats. Yes, some make unfair criticisms of decent men. But most feminists simply want equality with men and an end to their being treated as second class citizens. That seems reasonable enough to me.

        Comment by nick — September 5, 2014 @ 13:18 | Reply

  4. i become more and more feminist with age. i am happy to be female and i adore my sons. they also are rather spoiled so their future wives may think of me as a complete anti-feminist. whatever.
    anyways, what i am trying to say is that while most of the worlds women are still subject to all kinds of poor treatment, feminism has work to do.
    i would like to know what your comments were and i think that censorship of that type is the pathetic response of someone who is insecure in their position. i have more than once been excommunicated by someone who didnt like my logical objections to their folly.

    i like your opinionated self, ursula. dont give it up, we need people to challenge the plonks

    Comment by kylie — September 5, 2014 @ 00:06 | Reply

    • Oh, Kylie, I wish you hadn’t mentioned it. I have always enjoyed, and still do, looking after people. It gives me pleasure to keep everyone in fresh socks and their stomachs filled. However, linking back to what you said, only the other day I found myself lamenting to Apple of my Eye that I have failed him. Failed him. How? Well, fact is there are few (young) women out there these days who will so much as lift a finger. They are too busy picking holes into the fabric of their lives by berating men for doing manly things instead of changing a nappy. I fear for the Angel. I have pleaded with him to give me half an hour of his time to at least let me show him how not to turn the washing pink, and how to best do the washing up in absence of a dishwasher. He smiled, full of optimism, told me to relax and he will survive in my absence. I am sure he will [survive]. With hatred in his heart at the injustice of it all.

      I’d never call myself a ‘feminist’. Not least because my father drummed into me that “isms” stink. I grew up in a household where it was self understood that boys and girls/women and men have EQUAL rights. Neither shall I forget the moment when my mother drily remarked to never ever mention to her gender related toys. My mother does have three daughters, one son. Sure, my brother would play with his sisters and their dolls and stuff. But, in the immortal words of my mother: If you don’t give your son a toy gun/sword he’ll make one using a tree’s wooden stick.

      And this is where we come to the crux of the matter. Denying our differences (male/female) is useless. I detest militant female feminists. What is so awful that a lot of them don’t have the brain to differentiate between equality and banging on about what they perceive as men’s shortcomings. Well, I say, do write that poem, that symphony, that masterpiece, invent a light bulb, a bicycle when push comes to shove. Stop whining about the pram in the hallway. Just get on with it. And don’t blame men for you banging your head at some imaginary glass ceiling. You know, Kylie, whenever I hear/read about percentages of men/women in any walk of life I not so much sigh as try and look away. I believe in meritocracy. And for wo/men to give jobs to women on the strengths of being women rather than terrific at what the job description entails stinks to high heaven.

      Other than that: Thank you for endorsing my being “opinionated”.


      PS Hope to paste my response to said article as an addendum to my original post

      Comment by bitchontheblog — September 5, 2014 @ 03:45 | Reply

      • i agree with you on all counts except for the self labelling thing. i think you and i are talking about different versions of feminism

        Comment by kylie — September 5, 2014 @ 11:11 | Reply

  5. I am glad that your angst is against the newspaper and not against the feminist. Editorial policy of newspapers now a days are geared more towards the market place and the saleability of the paper than to offer a platform for debate and dissent. If I were you, I would heed your very wise son’s advice.

    Comment by rummuser — September 5, 2014 @ 00:40 | Reply

    • Ramana, I’ll do my damdest to follow my son’s advice. Mind you, it won’t be easy for me and I might be going up in smoke.

      As to your take on newspapers: Yes, of course, you are right. But what if someone like me (who reads tons of the stuff right across several languages and countries – out of interest but also as part of my day job) gets so sick of it all I just want to throw up? Then what? I mean it. Literally feeling nauseous with it all.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — September 5, 2014 @ 03:53 | Reply

      • I would then look at self preservation as the first priority,

        Comment by rummuser — September 6, 2014 @ 14:16 | Reply

        • Yes, Ramana, “self preservation”. A scarce commodity in Ursula world. It’s an art I will not master. Mainly on account of a skin not so much ‘thick’ as permeable. Filtering. I sometimes think if an illness will get me it’ll be one of two. Namely cancer of the throat. I swallow down so many tears on behalf of the world as I perceive it I sometimes feel as bloated as a bulldog frog. Luckily not green.

          Sunshine greetings, big smile,


          Comment by bitchontheblog — September 6, 2014 @ 20:32 | Reply

  6. I’m always chagrined (good word, eh?) when radical feminists rant and give us (yes, me, too) more moderate, reasonable feminists a bad name. Anyone who is so myopic and prejudiced as to turn a blind eye to another point of view is doing the same thing that they are probably bemoaning is happening to them. I applaud your efforts to shake up their world view, but speaking to people whose brains have turned to stone is futile.

    Comment by Lorna's Voice — September 10, 2014 @ 18:08 | Reply

    • Wise words from the sage. By the way, where are you when you are somewhere else?

      Yes, I too like the word ‘chagrin’. The French do it so well without killing themselves – unlike the Russians. Though do believe that once upon a time Vienna was the suicide capital of the world.


      Comment by bitchontheblog — September 10, 2014 @ 18:33 | Reply

      • Where are you when you are somewhere else? You are there. Where else would you be? 🙂

        Comment by Lorna's Voice — September 10, 2014 @ 20:44 | Reply

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